Many people are very good at giving praise. We see the end results of training and both appreciate and admire what was accomplished. They are our friends and we want them to excel and when a friend does, it is as if a part of us succeeded as well. And we express it.

“Congratulations!

That was great.

Wonderful.

Fantastic Job!’

These are the common comments. We know them. We say them. More so, we really mean them.

Yet when we are the recipient of true praise, we often squirm, look down and explain why and how it really was not so good. In fact, we could have and should have done better. Much better.

In summary, someone gave us a gift. A thoughtful, meaning gift. We in turn took it, appreciated it for a could of seconds and then explained to the giver how it was not the right color or size, how it was wrapped incorrectly and was nothing at all what we wanted. In short, we are often great at giving but need some work at receiving.

I took a training a few years ago and we did an odd but impactful exercise. There were some 4000 people in the room of which I knew a total of zero. We were to walk up to one another and based upon first impressions, give a compliment. The receiver of the compliment was to say nothing more than “thank you.”

Sounds simple and the act of doing this was indeed, simple. The tumbling and turning internally however, reminded me of a gymnastics competition performed by frogs on high dose caffeine. There was an urge to immediately return the compliment or to explain to the give how “inaccurate” or “misinformed” they were. Peeking around the room, it was easy to observe the squirming and uncomfortable physical reactions that were consistently occurring.

Why is it difficult at times to accept? Would we ever turn down a physical gift from a well meaning friend? After all, a compliment is an investment in happiness.

Is there a better investment that this?!